After 50 Years of Marriage, He Finally Touched Her Again
After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the wife felt her husband, begin to massage her in ways he hadn’t in quite some time.
It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then c*r*ssed her shoulders and neck, slowly worked his hand down, stopping just over her st*mach.
He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, w*rking down her side, passing gently over her b*tt*ck and down her leg to her calf. Then, he pr*c*eded up her thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent.
As she had become quite *r*used by this c*r*ssing, and proceeded to ask in a loving voice,
‘Honey that was wonderful. Why did you stop?’
He responded: ‘I found the remote.’…
Bonus Joke
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says,
“Please come over and help me. I have a challenging jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to get started.”
Her boyfriend asks,
“What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?”
The blonde replies,
“According to the picture on the box, it’s a rooster.”
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. When he arrives, he sees puzzle pieces scattered all over the table. He takes a moment to examine the pieces and then looks at her with a smile,
“First of all, no matter how we try, these pieces won’t resemble a rooster. Secondly, let’s not stress about it. How about we have a nice cup of tea and… put all these Corn Flakes back in the box?”
